Since around last decade I have seen the women fighting for their rights and now that struggle of gaining the rights have moved into the world of technology with campaigns launched on a world wide scale over the Internet. Thanks to twitter and facebook for such social networks where one can spread a word. But my real question to all the young ladies out there are, what are they actually fighting for?
The world is divided into continents, and every continent rather I should say every piece of land on earth has a different society, culture and set of rules to follow. One thinks a woman wearing a short skirt and a bikini is not a big deal. On the other side of the world, it’s considered a sin and in France a Muslim girl cannot even wear a scarf but a Christian nun can do so. So what are the actual women rights? Are they fighting for the dressing? If we come out of the dressing chaos then there are talks about the working women. Similarly as I mentioned earlier, in some parts of the world women are free to work but in some area, men respect women and don’t want them to work and do the hard work of life. But generally it is considered in the negative way and is misquoted as ‘Men are being rude’ or ‘Men is the enemy of Women’s freedom’.
The first thing we need to understand is the difference of society and culture, then debate on the rights. Why on Earth ‘we’, Muslim, world are fighting for the rights for women when the status of women is highly defined in our religion and which is not debatable. Did anyone ever try to find out who started this FIGHT for so called ‘women rights‘? In the part of the world where I live, my heaven lies under my mother’s feet. My life is with my sister, my stability is with my wife and my future is with my daughter. How can someone who lives in this part can even say that women are not given rights? In Islamic laws, women receives 1/3rd of the property after her parents. Isn’t this bad? No! Because she also receives the full property from her husband and has the right on the property of her children as well. So its not just 1/3rd, rather its far more than a man gets in a will.
In a culture where ‘Munni Badnaam Hoi’ and ‘Sheila Ki Jawani’ from bollywood is prevailing and a TV anchors like Mathira doing the ‘Guchi Guchi Gu’ in the most seductive way. TV drama serials where our mothers, wives and daughters are taught to play politics in their in-laws and where older women relationship with a younger boys and vise-versa are becoming the only stories for our drama serials. Under the influence of this culture a women is fighting for her rights? What rights are you talking about?
Few days back, I saw some pictures of a protest, shared by a friend on Facebook in which a girl was holding up some banners saying “Don’t tell me how to dress, tell them not to rape”. For God sake, what kind of protest and women rights are these? So what women are saying indirectly is, ‘Let me walk naked but don’t f*** me’? This is extremely stupid of women then if they are saying this. Women are provoking men to be like that and then holding men responsible for that. In Islam it is said that women will be the most in hell at the day of judgement. I guess I made my point very clear by this point now. Women are respectable in every relation but not the way they are heading towards. A women in Hijab will always be respected and a man will look at her in a totally different was as compared to the one in sleeveless shirt and shorts.
So from where this ‘Women Rights’ protest actually came from? In short, it came from the west. Why? The western cultured woman had insecurities of her life, that is why she started the fight for women rights. The women is not respected the way we Eastern do. While I was writing this article, I quickly Googled ‘Rape Ratio in World‘ and I came across some websites and I would like to share that.
Please tell me if you can find any Muslim country in even the top 20 among the rape statistics of the world? This is what the world is saying, not me. Divorce ratio is above 60% there, not in our Muslim counties. Marriage culture is dying there, not here. I hope now it became clear to you that these shout about ‘Women Rights’ is their, not ours. And stop making issues of one bad fish which exists in every society if she had done something wrong.
worth reading! gud work Talal! keep it up.
Interest Point of View, but much of it is not valid.
When a man doesn’t want his spouse to work, it is not out of respect. 99.9% of the time it is for the man to retain control, for POWER. And please, “respect for the woman not to do hard work”? It’s plenty hard to keep a household running is 24 hrs a day, every day of the year- you cannot minimize that. But if a woman has a choice to earn a paycheck, then she also has a choice if she needs you or not. That is scary for men who feel they are not worthy of their spouse, or think of her as their property.
Also, if you have no self control to see a human in a natural state (a hint of skin, full blown naked or whatever) that you cannot control your impulses, then you are better suited to the animal kingdom. Don’t give me that women are so precious they must be covered or man will lose it and attack??? What sense is this, beside an excuse.
Don’t believe the brainwashing society gives you. Those statistics are a bunch of garbage for many many reasons, and you probably already know it. Unfortunately there is no perfect society yet here on the planet we all share. But some communities are truly still in the Stone Ages, and their people suffer for it.
There is no law against women driving in Saudi Arabia, yet almost no women drive. Societies make the strongest rules. Plenty of Saudi women would love to drive, but are afraid of barbaric discrimination from their neighbor.
Only when people are given true freedom can they show they deserve it. When allowed the chance and the freedom, all humans are inherently good. Only by way of mental defect are they bad.
You agreed and disagreed with my points at the same time which is very confusing. I don’t know if you are a Muslim women or not, so I will try to give both point of views again.
In Islam a women are given “under the care of” a man (her husband) not allotted to them or sold to them. (Ref Quran: http://quran.com/3/37) In another context in Quran it is states that “Men are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth. So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband’s] absence what Allah would have them guard. But those [wives] from whom you fear arrogance – [first] advise them; [then if they persist], forsake them in bed; and [finally], strike them. But if they obey you [once more], seek no means against them. Indeed, Allah is ever Exalted and Grand.” (Ref: http://quran.com/4/34). This clearly tells us that Men are made the incharge and women are given “under the CARE” of them, not under the rule of them.
Now coming to the non-religious point of view. Household work is super-hard and requires an extreme effort. Mom works 24/7 round the clock for her children. Can you stop a mom from working for her children? Never, she will not stop because she is in extreme love with them. She is already doing a huge effort so why she has to work outside as well? adding an additional responsibility? Women is weak physically (in certain ways), and emotionally. The “best” way to deal with is to let men work and provide food, shelter and love to their women. Though there’s no harm in women to work, if she wants to. But as a respect by men (in my society at least) to women, we don’t want them to go out and work. I would do everything to comfort my wife to give her the relaxing life so she enjoys it, and I will take on the hard work for her. This is men’s mentality (in some cases). On the other hand you mentioned about the control of our animal. Please try an experiment, put a honey bottle without a cap and with a cap and see how many flies come on which bottle. Human is naturally attracted to beauty (Note: I said beauty). Females (I’m not limiting myself to humans now) are very beautiful and very attractive and Males love them. Women in Saudi Arabia or some other places are covered. Why they are not raped the way they are in US and UK?
Coming to the statistics reports that I shared, you called them all INVALID. How? Please prove it. All my points that I am mentioning are supported with references. So please do give me references to how you said they are invalid. How can you say that women are not raped in India, UK, US and other places in EU? And I provided multiple references which all are saying the same thing.
About Saudi Arabia – So after all the discussion comes just ONE POINT to raise that women are not allowed to drive? Then you should limit your efforts for this that yes, women rights are violated here, not on the other things.
Foremost I appreciate your skills to take a subject like such and provoke a different thought on it… but as I was going through your post I had a strange feeling that even u were only biased and not confident about what you have to talk.. I mean was it a note regarding Muslim women and their rights or Media effects on Muslim women or social apprehension and Muslim women…cos if this was the debate of Muslim women and their rights, let me state a fact that the whole thing makes o sense..”Women Rights” concept actually triggered from the era when feminist movements were drawn to overcome the dark patriarchal rule and system of early Europe…with the passage of time the movement had seized and now whatever is brought on the name is strictly GEOGRAPHICAL as per clear laws.. so here ticks off ur point of that different cultures have different rules
I appreciate again that how you have explained that women themselves are exploiting their own vies, being and reputation but again I would have appreciated you much further for a line or two on the dark cursed presence of patriarchal society in almost every nook and corner of the planet earth.
I don’t want to sound feminist but yes! If we talk about facts a mere glance on your personal or media vision room does not conclude the subject… You cannot blame a victim’s movement because of the full bloom conspired activity behind it, because of the lousy stomach filling hypocrites behind the movement… the rights to live are still demanded by women, the right to compete are demanded, the right to security (foremost the self security within family) are asked for, the rights to observe their dignity and their beliefs…
You may debate that the same rights are ven sourced for MEN as well but we never heard about it and thus I conclude again that WOMEN RIGHTS was a movement triggered ONLY at an era when there was no space of women in any race of life be it social, political, scholastic or spiritual but with passage of time women found her way to these places…the only issues that’s left behind for today’s women rights is geographical and that cannot be decided living in a country as a couch potato. there’s a real world out there around which still believes women to be a non living creature and from there rises their rights movement… its all about the demand of rights against the sufferings ..You cannot label them under a box or branding…
Coming to the point of “Rape” discussion, dear writer I feel pity writing that even u see women as a piece of ornamentation and nothing else…cos if that was not the case I would have also seen statistics regarding scholastics, social empowerment and political allowance of the women too..!! I think that is all that could be said for it!!
I’m amazed, I have to admit. Rarely do I come asrcos a blog that’s equally educative and engaging, and without a doubt, you have hit the nail on the head. The problem is something not enough men and women are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy that I came asrcos this in my hunt for something regarding this.
Women rights arent proclaimed or hegemonized by western culture we are jus too naive too see reality even our own culture.. Jus tell me as a man are you save to send ur sister or mothet outside home alone even in pakistan.. Start frm the scratch.. Go ans surway the villages go to interior punjab.. N one thing our culture is differenr then religion. Pakis always mix the both concepts if ppl wud hv followed the culture its man praticed .. Religion is Allaah ‘s created lije everythin else.. N our religion clearly talks abu women rights and ways to conquer them our culture doesnt.. !!
Dear talal wonderful efforts…
you know talal few years back when i see the women having placards in their hands and demanding for their rights…
I think the same as have mentioned in your blog post..
but now i know the reality is totally different, you have mentioned the statistics of the rape. these are the ratios of the cases registers but in our country there is no system of register such incidents ..
you know why??? in the countries like Pakistan women is not been considered as human. you know dear talal in the district where i am working… most of the people don’t register their marriages and not even their nikkah being offered according to the Islamic rules, they are all Muslims, according to the Islamic rules their marriages are not legal… what is your point of view about them??
It was just one issue regarding the women rights… there are so many ….
Dear Barkat,
Thanks for your comments and letting me know about these issues. See I had always been saying that the world is not a perfect place. There are good things and bad things both side by side. Now lets talk about the Ratio of such cases with the ones that are registered. Age: 15 – 64 years is 59.1% of Pakistan’s population ( 53,658,173 males and 49,500,786 females.) Can you tell me out of 59.1% how many are married couples? (Sorry I couldn’t find out the exact statistics) So give me a rough estimate of these marriages. Then compare the ratio of non-registered marriages, how many are they? It might be just 1:100000. Secondly you mentioned about “register their marriage”. Registering a marriage is TOTALLY SEPARATE THING as compared to NIKKAH. You are wrong in this point of yours. Let me clarify you now, there are couples who got married and did nikkah “but did not register themselves in the database of Pakistan”. This is what you is meant by registering. Once they register, their FAMILY TREE starts in the NADRA Database. This registering a marriage helps in census. It has nothing to do with Nikkah.
Again, I would mention the same thing, kindly give me ratio of where women are considered inhuman (in your opinion) compared to millions studying in universities and colleges?
In India there are villages where ONE girl is married to ALL THE brothers of her husband, hence having multiple husbands. But the whole India is not like that. Is it?
When a man doesn’t want his spouse to work, it is not out of respect. 99.9% of the time it is for the man to retain control, for POWER. And please, “respect for the woman not to do hard work”? It’s plenty hard to keep a household running is 24 hrs a day, every day of the year- you cannot minimize that. But if a woman has a choice to earn a paycheck, then she also has a choice if she needs you or not. That is scary for men who feel they are not worthy of their spouse, or think of her as their property.
Also, if you have no self control to see a human in a natural state (a hint of skin, full blown naked or whatever) that you cannot control your impulses, then you are better suited to the animal kingdom. Don’t give me that women are so precious they must be covered or man will lose it and attack??? What sense is this, beside an excuse.
Don’t believe the brainwashing society gives you. Those statistics are a bunch of garbage for many many reasons, and you probably already know it. Unfortunately there is no perfect society yet here on the planet we all share. But some communities are truly still in the Stone Ages, and their people suffer for it.
There is no law against women driving in Saudi Arabia, yet almost no women drive. Societies make the strongest rules. Plenty of Saudi women would love to drive, but are afraid of barbaric discrimination from their neighbor.
Only when people are given true freedom can they show they deserve it. When allowed the chance and the freedom, all humans are inherently good. Only by way of mental defect are they bad.
Mr. Masood,
I would like to respond to your original post. I live in America. I am a single mother of three. I have been a single mom most of my children’s lives. They are wonderful, respectful, creative, intelligent, and strong. They have all gone to college or are starting college this year. As a single mom, I have had to work AND care for them on my own for many years. That has meant working two jobs and going to school at the same time for several years. I did this so I could be with them more as a mother, because being their mother was very important to me.
I have lived both sides – as a married woman (in a relationship much like in the Muslim household you described), and as a single mom on my own. I would much prefer being a single mom even though that means being alone and having to work harder in order to survive.
I respect your views and I know that the society you live in is very different from mine. However, I believe that a woman’s right to live and breathe and work and play in any society should not be counted less than a man’s right to do so. Women are more equal to men than you think, if given a chance. We are intelligent, strong, determined and very capable of caring for ourselves and our children. We don’t deserve to be cooped up, restricted, or controlled because men think that is our only part to play.
We don’t deserve to be raped or treated differently whether wearing a Hijab or wearing shorts and a tank top. When it is hot and a man takes off his shirt, is he jumped on and raped by the nearest woman?? No. Women have more control than that. Men should and need to have more control over themselves. For your statistics, do you take into account the rapes that are not reported due to the woman’s fear she will be accused of “indecency” or “adultery” (even though it was rape) and either be shunned, divorced and abandoned, or stoned to death in the streets? When rape victims in your society are not silenced by the threats of your male-dominated culture, you will see something very different in those numbers of yours. I do hope you realize that.
Mr. Masood, the world is changing. Humans are traveling, moving more freely than ever before. We are becoming more homogenized throughout the world and more tolerant of other cultures. And that is a good thing. It uplifts all of us and makes humans as a whole stronger. Yet women in many countries are not treated as well as the male of our species. They are treated as unequal, as unworthy, even as cattle in some societies and have no rights to property or status, to the ability to work and support themselves, to move about where they will, or even a right to protect their own bodies. I feel in my heart that this inequality is very wrong. I know what I am capable of as a woman…as a human being…and it is way more than just being a mother and housewife.
I know humanity is waiting for the chance to grow out of the habit of treating people differently. Question is…are we brave enough to make a difference and see that growth happen?
Sincerely,
Dani K
Hello Dani,
It was nice to read your comment. I read it the first day you posted but unfortunately didn’t get the time to write back. Anyhow!
I do agree with you on most of the points and slightly disagree on some. I had always respected women, and there’s clearly no doubt that the things women are doing in our society and in our lives are highly appreciated and there’s no comparison of it. I totally agree with your point that women plays an important role, and are really good in doing things ‘if’ given a chance. I am living in UAE from last almost 3 years now, and I have seen women working here as well as in Pakistan. I didn’t find much of a difference to my surprise. They are good managers, keep things tidy and achieve their goals. If you talk about my society, then my society is different in many sense. I am brought up in the second biggest city of my country which is a metropolitan city and people from outside comes to work and get settled there.
Again to your point that women should not become target of rape and crime, I do agree with that. But one thing you mentioned yourself is about the control of minds and senses. I do not believe that any guy would just rape a girl who’s wearing a tank top or shorts. Only 0.001% of the cases would be so where this would happen. Otherwise, I have seen video clips from your society as well as from mine when a consent sexual moments are recorded. So who to blame for it? Unfortunately, we do highlight that women are raped but we don’t see anywhere that a man is raped. That does not mean a man cannot be raped by a woman. Any girl can tear off her clothes and come in public and can blame any man. This is a common practice that is there in every society that woman is 99% of the times considered innocent. Even in the divorce cases 99% of the time man is blamed for not have a good married life. Coming back to your point of having a control. I know a lot of women who don’t have control either, but most of them do have. It is a nature’s thing I would say, as nature of people varies irrespective of gender.
I assure you that in my society, women are treated very well and are given priorities. They are respected as mothers, wives, sisters and daughters. Yes and I cannot give any figure on the crime rate which happens every where in the world. In US, your society is liberal and instead of teaching not to have sex, they are taught to have safe sex and by the age of 16-18 if you haven’t had sex, you are considered inferior. Here in my society having sex without marriage is a taboo. We teach to avoid it, not to have it safely because we respect women and don’t want to ruin their life and don’t want to put a baby in their womb and let her face all the consequences alone.
Last of all, I might contradict with my own statements here. I have talked to a lot of women from a lot of countries. All women are same and they do worry about their existence. None of them wants to be raped, and rather most of them try to protect their virginity for their true love. AND it is unfortunate but a universal truth, that this world is man dominant society. That’s how things are, and will remain.
Mr. Masood,
Thank you for your reply. I appreciate that you are honest in your opinions and I appreciate your intelligence and ability to be surprised and possibly change your opinion slightly about women’s abilities. In exchange, you have taught me a bit about your society, too.
I think sometimes we forget that what we see on the news and on TV is mostly reported for “shock value” and not necessarily “normal” for a society as a whole, no matter which society is being talked about. That there are many people in countries like yours and mine who are everyday living their lives with a good conscience. That many live for the good of others. I think, even in the US, most people aren’t criminals or morally destitute. Neither are they in your country. What we view and read about each other is vastly different than what is actually true.
Whether I think your society’s rules are right or wrong or that you think my society’s rules are right or wrong isn’t the point. You live in your world and I live in mine. Hopefully, since the world is constantly changing and people (male and female) from different societies are managing to work together, maybe males will not be dominant in the future as much? Maybe, one day, men and women will be equal in rights and status. That it will no longer matter if you are male or female – you would have a right to life, a place to live, sustenance, education, work that fits your intelligence and abilities, and the right to walk the road you wish to travel without someone else saying you can’t because you aren’t the right sex. It is something I, as a woman and a human being, would fight to see happen.
I believe that, since a woman’s basic rights are not equal to a man’s in many places in the world today, that women’s rights should be fought for by everyone, wherever they are.
With respect,
Dani K
I to agree with you about the corruption of media that how they play with our minds. About crime in your country or my country, NO religion or society promotes crime. NO religion tells a man to rape or even act bad to a woman. Rather, even in wars, soldiers are told not to touch women and children. So I believe this is not even a matter to discuss.
If I talk about my religious beliefs, then Islam already made it clear that near the end of the world (before dooms day or some call it apocalypse) women will be in greater number than men in terms of population. And if I’m not mistaken the figure is like 11 women will be for 1 man. LOL, so ultimately women will rule the world :p *just kidding*
Again I would stand by my words that the women rights vary from place to place. In west, women fight for a different right. In east, women have a different type of lifestyle and rights.
I just came across this article http://bit.ly/1Dc1xVs .. this is again some sort of ‘control’ that you mentioned earlier. May be women naturally got control to hold them self if they see a muscular topless man but a topless woman would certainly gain lusty gaze. Its natural and you cannot control it. Just like the part of nature that females are attractive and males follow them (it does not apply just to humans, rather animals as well).
If you would like to know, I can share some Islamic thoughts about Women Rights as well (though I’m not a scholar but can try give you the real information). But again you have to consider this that every Muslim would not be following 100% of his religion. So if one is an asshole, you cannot say everyone is an asshole 🙂